The Body Cannot Fully Relax When You’re at War With Yourself
Women were never taught to be kind to ourselves, we were taught to judge and critique ourselves so it’s not your fault.
Today I made an IG Reel that I wanted to share with you.
If you don’t love yourself, if you don’t like yourself,
and you’re constantly criticizing,
being mean to yourself,
nervous system regulation is never going to work for you long-term.
You’ll always end up dysregulated.
Because regulation can’t exist in an abusive relationship.
If we look at being regulated as a sense of safety and calm.
Then if you were in an abusive relationship, it would make sense that your body would constantly be dysregulated because you’d always be on edge, never knowing when your partner is going to be mean, or rude, or moody.
There wouldn’t be much time for feeling calm because you’d always be bracing, waiting for the next argument.
What’s happening is the same thing, except for this time, the other person isn’t the threat. You are a threat to yourself by the way that you treat yourself, by the way that you talk to yourself, and think about yourself.
Your body can never fully relax when you’re at war with yourself.
And so, you can learn all the breathing techniques, and the grounding techniques, and the meditations.
But if you finish meditating, you feel calm, and then two minutes later, you start thinking thoughts like:
“I’m behind.” “I should be doing more.” “Oh my gosh, I need to hurry up.” “I gotta keep going.” “Why is everybody further ahead than me?”
Then you’re just going to become dysregulated again because your nervous system is still under attack.
Women were never taught to be kind to ourselves, we were taught to judge and critique ourselves so it’s not your fault.
But now it’s time to reprogram this pattern.
If you’re exhausted from overthinking, constantly criticizing yourself, and feeling like your nervous system never fully settles…which stops you from taking action and going after your dreams and goals.
I’m opening a few complimentary Feminine Body Blueprint Sessions this week.
In this 45-minute session, we’ll look at:
• the pattern your body has been stuck in
• why self-regulation hasn’t fully lasted
• what’s keeping you disconnected from yourself
• and what it would take to start feeling safe in your body again
You’ll also experience a short grounding practice to help you reconnect with your body in real time.
Reply and ask any questions or book your call here
Much love,
Essence