Sharing Your Gifts Can Feel Like This (And It’s Not What You Think)
Here's the naked truth...
Answering Your Calling and stepping up to lead can feel like this…
You show up at your crush’s door with a trench coat on.
You’re naked underneath.
You slowly open the coat with a sly smile on your face.
You let him see you.
He stares at you for a second.
Then just closes the door.
Yikes…
That’s what sharing your soul work can feel like.
You tell your family about your calling…and they think you’re crazy.
You go live, and only one person watches.
You go to a networking event and tell your story in front of the whole room, and no one asks for your business card.
You let people see you.
You were bare.
And then there’s nothing.
That old familiar feeling of rejection stabs you in the heart again.
Now you just want to hide.
And maybe you have for months.
What’s Actually Happening
That sense of humiliation, that sense of rejection, often isn’t even about being visible.
It’s about something from the past.
Another time you felt exposed.
Another time you felt unwanted.
Another time you were seen… and not chosen.
Your nervous system never wants that to happen again.
So when you share your soul work and that feeling rises even if nothing bad happened, your body says:
Nope.
We’re done.
Not doing that again.
And you disappear.
Sometimes it’s for a day and sometimes for months.
Why It Takes So Long to Come Back
It can take weeks or months for your nervous system to relax & regulate around being seen.
It can take time to for it to forget the initial shock.
Then one day you get a download.
You feel inspired and pour your heart out.
And suddenly you’re naked in front of the internet again.
And the cycle repeats.
This isn’t inconsistency.
This is exposure without capacity.
The Work
One part of the work is asking:
When have I felt this exposed before?
High school?
A relationship?
A parent?
Let your body remember because if the past isn’t processed, it keeps showing up in the present especially when you’re visible.
But healing the past isn’t the only work.
The deeper work is building the capacity to stay with yourself when those feelings rise.
To breathe.
To hold yourself.
To nurture yourself.
To not disappear when you feel exposed.
Maybe you share your wisdom on day one.
Maybe the next day you need space.
Maybe you need a buffer day.
That’s okay.
Consistency doesn’t mean forcing.
It means learning the rhythm that feels safe in your body.
And you can’t learn that rhythm if you’re not connected to your body.
That connection, that intimacy with yourself is what allows you to show up without shutting down.
So instead of asking yourself how to be more consistent…maybe the better question is:
Can I stay with myself when it feels like too much and a part of me wants to hide?
In the next email, we’ll dive a little deeper into another way your body tries to protect you.
Much love,
Essence
